Because this seems like a good place to store this letter til i can send it.

"SHE" didnt say much about u - i basically gathered that u are closeted. being home was good, relaxing... i can barely stand slu anymore the place is just so backward, there is never anything to do and no place to go. i dont remember u telling me about yr online classes either because u never told me or i just forgot (equally likely). good luck with yr loan application, what is it for? (even though u may have told me, knowing u it is more than likely that u have changed your mind already).

no i did not do it with him. i dont live there anymore - partly because i wasnt gettin along with his bitchy bf and partly coz of financial problems so i moved back in with my aunt. i have "experimented" more than u think but i am sure less than u - sounds like u have done more than your fair share of experimenting so do share the details (wtf is Hee hee haw haw!??). dont u use msn messenger or yahoo messenger? i have dsl at work now so i am online all day. are u working btw?

ttyl
D

PS dude if u are gay then all i believed about the world is wrong >>>insert appropriate mock dramatizations here<<<

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Because i wanted to write this down

Dear C,
i dont hate you. i hate me for letting u make me believe i was something i am not. seeing u with him did not bother me although that is what jmj made all his jokes about. thinking that u saw me and passed me without greeting me tore me up which again was a thought put into my head by jmj. even if he was str8 or u were on a date i know u could have acknowledged me without him knowing if u wanted to. therefore the only acceptable explanation is that u did not see me standing there which i now believe was the case. i guess its my fault u did not realise i was hurt/upset (i dont know what i was feeling) since i usually seem so coldhearted. so i dont blame u for not trying to placate me although i wish u had.

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